EvaLaDiva

Saturday, 3 October 2009

Getting over a break up

So my friend is going through a break up which breaks my heart to watch as i have been through soooo many myself. I just wish i could take it away for her.

However there is a plus side to going through this heart wrenching activity and that is self development.

here is a little advise from someone who has been there and done it, first things first....
1. Never ever ever go back on your word! You made the decision to finish it so let it be. You split up for a reason, getting back together is self destructive and you know deep down it aint gonna work so whats the point going back a phase. You have already started to get over him (although it may not feel that way) but trust me, the process has started, whats the point prolonging it??

2. Exercise!!! This is the last thing you will feel like doing, however it gives you a sense of self worth, ups your sex drive and gives you confidence. You will never over do it and its something that will ALWAYS make you feel better. If absolutely nothing else, it will help you sleep....which brings me to number.....

3. Rest, the more tired you are the more irrational thinking you have. a rested mind is more at peace and helps you think with reasoning and rationally. you don't want to be an over sensitive mess so make sure you sleep, especially before "talking" with him.

4. PARTY OK so this is debatable, people think you shouldn't be getting drunk while in emotional pain but in my mind as long as its kept light hearted with minimal drunken heart to hearts (especially on phone to ex) this can soothe the soul, preferably with some shaking of booty too. Helps to remind you that you are attractive and you can have fun without the person you once thought you would spend the rest of your life with. Just try not to touch your phone, give it to a friend if you think you are in any danger of calling him

5. NEVER call him!!!! If a guy wants to speak to you he will come for you, whats the point embarrassing each other. Don't do it, Nope not even to see how he is.

6. Keep busy. Make sure you fill your diary up, your friends are happy to help at times like these. Between exercise seeing friends and partying i promise it doesn't take long to remember how unique and wonderful you are, and that's the reason why break ups hurt, you feel you are not worthy of that person you once thought was your soul mate, the person you thought you would be spending the rest of your life with. The minute you realise how truly fantastic you are is the minute you wont feel so bad. Stay confident. Never think you wont find love again..... because you will!!! If you love you, others will too. its the fear of rejection in all of us that makes us weak, accept yourself for who you are.

7. Remember, it feels bad now but tomorrow, it will feel a little better, and the next day, better still. I promise there will be a day that you forget to think about him.

8. BE TRUE TO YOURSELF AND YOUR HEART you know if he is the right one deep in your heart and soul. Do what feels right for you.

9. Surround yourself with people who love you. Be sure to be in a secure environment, this will always make you feel stronger and be able to deal with things in a cool and calm manner.

10. Take advice from loved ones. They probably know you better than you know yourself, they can see when you are truly happy. Ask what they thought and how they feel about him, chances are they confirm all the reasons you split and can see that you will be better off without him. There is more out there for you, don't ever forget it.

You will love again, and you will be loved, more than you ever thought possible..... I Promise XXXX

Friday, 22 May 2009

we all have lazy days

Very recently my auntie died, we planned to go to the funeral but as it was 6 hours drive away i had to meet my parents at their house at 6 pm. You can imagine driving through the city at that time was a complete nightmare. I was running late with all the traffic and noticed my red petrol light was on (meaning there was no petrol in my car) This is one of those things i HATE doing. I find it a real chore and i tend to procrastinate although i know i shouldn't. Knowing this is a stressful time for all the family after the death of my auntie i really didn't want to be late. It is quite a distance to my parents house but i just thought i would make it so carried on without filling up.

The funeral was emotional, we are all such a close family and there is nothing more important to me than my family. It was a lovely service though and it was good to see all my cousins. After the funeral we went to visit my grandfathers grave, had a bite to eat and then set off for another 6 hour journey. We got back to my parents house about midnight. I remembered about my fuel tank being empty and decided i would go straight to a petrol station. I got about a hundred yards away from the pump when my engine cut out. I couldn't even roll to the pump as it was up hill. I was SO close but yet SO far. I called my brother and told him to come and push me to the pump. A Couple of minutes later my whole family came round in the 4x4 my dad owns. My mom was crying with laughter and i laughed too at the ridiculous situation i got myself into. I couldn't help but feel so honoured that my family all came running to my rescue. I steered the car as my mom dad and 2 brothers pushed the car to the pump in the pitch black at by this time half past midnight.

I made myself (and my family) so much more work than needed by being lazy and procrastinating. It is absolutely my own fault that happened and i have now learned to fill up my tank no matter how much i cant be bothered and how late I'm running and how bad the traffic is. It was really funny though i'm sure we will all remember it :-)